My Coworker Kissed Me. I’m Absolutely Petrified. Apologizing To Him is Out of Question. What Next?

Canoodling with an office coworker might cause real trouble. It may seem like there’ll never be a danger, but kissing a coworker is guaranteed to change things.

Dear Jane,

I’m totally petrified that this happened at the annual office party. Things got out of hand and my coworker kissed me, which I enthusiastically reciprocated. It wasn’t just a peck. We basically hooked up with each other for a full ten minutes until it was time to leave.

Luckily everyone at the office was drunk and I saw a couple of coworker act like absolute idiots. (My boss was throwing up on his desk, another coworker was pretending to pole-dance in the pantry area, etc.) I won’t lie, I feel kissing a coworker is a morally wrong thing to do.

My coworker who kissed me is a nice enough guy, but I don’t think either of us is thinking future. I am so embarrassed. I liked him but I never imagined I’d do anything like this. Apologizing to him would be weird. Ignoring the whole thing feels weird too. What is right? What should be my next step?

Help! Kissy Minaj

My Coworker Kissed MeJane’s Answer:

The seductive scent of the forbidden office romance is a powerful aphrodisiac. You’re at your most intense during the 8 hours you spend with one another, seeing each other at your best and your worst, both of which can led you to develop a crush on your coworker.

No need to take the matter further. Sometimes you take a lesson from your dog: when you take a dump in public, you simply kick some dirt over the turd, and move on without looking back. Do not look too far into it, and don’t try to catch feelings for him.

Above all, don’t feel humiliated. We all do things we’re later embarrassed about. Forgive yourself and try to learn from the experience. (And, drink moderately at the office party.)

Q&A with Jane: The brutal and straightforward answers to HR-related queries and concerns. Send in your queries with the subject line ‘Ask JANE HARPER’ at

Jane Harper
Writer. Human resources expert and consultant. Follow @thehrdigest on Twitter

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